10 Ways to Prepare for Your Child Custody Case in California
You don’t want to lose custody of your child. Learn how to prepare for your custody case so you’re ready for court.
Your children are dear to you.
You want them to stay in your life. You are about to go through a very difficult time with the possibility that you may lose them to the state or to a spouse or former spouse or even to another family member through child custody proceedings.
What can you do to prevent this from happening?
Today, we’re taking a closer look at how you can prepare for your child custody case in California.
Prepare for Your Child Custody Case in California
There are a few things you should know about child custody cases before you start your preparation.
We’re here to help you understand what you can start doing today.
Any judge will have one overriding consideration that will influence his decision in a custody case. The most important factor is what’s best for the children. It’s all about what the child wants, not what you or your spouse or the judge thinks is best.
In the event that you do need to go to court, there are certain things you can do to prepare for the legal process. A family law attorney can guide you through this process.
1. Get a qualified, certified family attorney
Finding a good attorney is your best chance to keep custody of your children. She can advise you on what a judge will be looking for, what things you can do in your personal life to bolster your chances, and what things will happen when and if your case goes to court.
Ask your attorney questions like what factors are important in gaining temporary custody of your children? What would be the consequences of giving temporary custody to the other parent? If you lose temporary custody, what should you do to improve your situation and eventually get permanent custody?
What happens in court?
2. Keep a journal
Attorneys (and judges) like records and documents, so as much as possible, you should keep a journal and write down everything you consider important including the following:
- what activities you spend with your children and when
- the total time you spend with your children
- the activities and time the other parent spends with the children (if any)
- the times the other parent goes to work, comes home, and travels out of town
- note any negative behavior on the part of the other parent including remarks, If you pay child support, make sure you make payments on time and there is a record of each payment. If you receive payments, keep a record of the dates you received them.
3. Have a good job and home environment
You want to show that you are a good caretaker and are able to provide for your children. You should have a reliable, sustainable job and a comfortable place to live. You should show interest in your children’s education and show that you prepare your children for school and arrange for any childcare that is needed.
Keep your home safe for children. Don’t have weapons like guns in the house, or at least make sure they are locked away. Make sure dangerous chemicals are not accessible, along with alcohol and prescription medications. Do not have illegal drugs on the premises.
4. Show that you are engaged with your children
If you haven’t been engaged with your children before, now is a good time to start. You want to show a pattern of support by spending as much time with your children as you can. You don’t want to miss appointments involving your children. Take them to sporting events or school activities, dance class, music lessons, etc. and pick them up on time.
Be responsible and flexible. If your child is sick and needs to come home from school, make sure you can pick him or her up. If there are unexpected practices for sports or lessons, be accommodating.
5. Reexamine your inner circle
The other parent’s lawyer or the judge in the case will look at the people you surround yourself with, to get a better idea of your values and to see what positive or negative impact they may have on your children.
You must avoid anyone with a felony record, anyone with drug dealings, anyone with sexual-related offenses, etc. And you may want to avoid having a new partner live with you or stay overnight in the event it may upset your children.
6. Drive safely and responsibly
A judge will want to make sure you understand safety with regard to your children, and that includes driving them anywhere. Make sure you check that, whenever your children are in your car, they use car seats or wear seat belts.
Observe traffic laws. You want to show responsibility and not recklessness. A traffic ticket or even a warning for speeding would not strengthen your case of concern for your children.
7. Avoid Inappropriate situations
It is important for you to avoid any situation that may be construed as inappropriate. This includes dating or spending time with a boyfriend or girlfriend while your children are left alone. It also includes having non-family people sleep over on a couch, etc. And it includes letting children sleep in your bed or bathing with your children because of the possible negative interpretations possible.
You should avoid large parties, especially involving alcohol. Do not bring your children to bars, R-rated movies, or rock concerts. Have babysitters who are responsible and behave appropriately. Do a background check on them or use a reputable agency.
8. Demonstrate good overall character
One of the items mentioned above was engagement with your children. But this goes further, and you should demonstrate good overall character, and get to know the people in your children’s lives: the teachers, the coaches, the PTA parents, the after-hours instructors.
Do not disparage or fight with your ex in public or in front of your children. Keep your cool and control your temper. Emotions run high at a time like this. Instead of ranting in public, use private ways to work through your feelings with friends or family members.
9. Prepare for the legal proceedings
As your custody hearing gets closer, you will want to confer with your attorney on the process to make sure you are prepared for what’s to come. You should work with your attorney to go over any journals or documents that might be important. You should also work on a list of reliable witnesses, especially professionals and volunteers who work with your children – teachers and coaches, etc.
You can use your journal to recall negative situations regarding the other parent. You can relate what you saw or heard directly, but you can’t use simple “hearsay” of what you heard from third parties – unless those parties are present and can corroborate what you
10. Be aware of possible third-party evaluations
Sometimes, California judges will order a child custody evaluation (“730 Evaluation”) as part of the proceedings. An evaluation can also be requested by either party in a “dissolution” case by agreement and after filing a “stipulation.”
The full evaluation or min-evaluation (also called focused-issue evaluation) is used to look at the parenting practices or mental health of one or both parents, or possible child abuse factors. The mini-evaluation is less extensive, may cover only one or two issues, and is designed to speed things along in the case.
A family law attorney or child custody attorney can explain the 730 Evaluation to you and what it might mean – just the way she can explain and help you with all other aspects of your child custody case.
Are you in search for a certified attorney to represent you?
Let us help you find one today!
